What do you spend the majority of your time thinking about? Do you actually have thoughts about one particular subject that override all others? Let’s really pin it down with three further questions. Do you have a passion? Do you have a healthy obsession? Is there something you want to achieve that requires most, if not all, of your attention?
Very successful people would answer in the positive to the majority of those questions. That’s the first thing to be clear on. If you want success, you’ve got to be dedicated, to your passion.
“The train of your thoughts refers directly to what we can describe as the driving force for success”
For a very long time I’ve fought the tendency for my mind to be slightly obsessional. In some ways, those who’re likely to advise me against obsessive thinking, would be correct. Let’s be specific though, obsessive thoughts, can fit into two categories:
- Healthy, that drive positive outcomes
- Unhealthy, that drive self-destructive outcomes
The fight against obsessive thinking is a little strange, and to some extent, is simply a battle between factions of the mind, whose ultimate aim, is the same: to decide the nature of life. Put another way, one part of the mind is contented to settle back for comfort, ease and stability, the other, longs for something more.
It comes down to mentality or beliefs. The mentality of seeking comfort, predictability and ease, is the consequence of childhood learnings. The mentality of seeking more, be that challenge, change or variety, is often one introduced to us much later in life. The battle that raged within me, was, in a sense, simply being fought between two sets of belief systems. The first driven by fear, the second driven by love.
When put this way it can seem a little simplistic, however, I’d prefer you viewed this as a ‘beautiful simplification.’
Now for the reason I say this. Once we breakdown, what can seem a jumble of unsolvable and confusing conflicts, into its most basic components, we stand a much greater chance of winning the battle for the best. And be in no doubt, we must ensure love, is the winner.
The mentality driven by fear, is the one that’s looking to avoid the unsettling things we associate with change and variety. Potentially, and especially if your childhood had similarities to mine, the time we found these things unsettling, was during our development. Were you insecure as a child?
As children we crave stability, structure and security. It’s true to say, when children, we do in fact require plenty of security and stability. Insecure children grow up to be insecure adults who may shy away from life enhancing activities. Show me someone who lives with depression and I’ll show you an insecure inner child.
“Where our next meal is coming from, where we go to sleep at night – surrounded by familiar people who love us – is very important. The line to draw here though, is this: we’re no longer children”
If you’ve been fortunate enough to have been shown powerful role models, that clearly distinguished between the security of childhood and the adventure of adulthood, all will be well. If not, you will need to find these role models, later in life. This does potentially have the downside of creating a battle between old and new, however, we must remember, every battle can be won.
Winning the battle is decided by train of thought. Decide to become actively involved with training your mind. Wake each day to remind yourself what each part of your mind is seeking, and decide what that higher part of your mind, wants. That’s to say, do you seek a life driven by fear, or one driven by love? It’s very, very easy, when seen in this light.
Be strong with yourself. Follow each link. Read them several times. Decide: is the driving fear, or is it love? It really is that simple,
Will it be you I get to spend time with this September? It starts here.