One to One Attitude Unavailable

Attitude

We’ve come a long way since the days of ‘put-up-and-shut-up.’ This kind of attitude to life is no longer accepted by the majority. Humanity has, and is looking to solve many of the riddles and conundrums, to life. For example, why is it good people, always seem to get the shitty end of the stick? In answer to that, it’s not so much about good or bad that makes the difference, it’s about having a proper grip on the realities of life, that does. It’s also about understanding the influences of the past on the present.

“Most times, we do need to understand the importance of putting ones own needs, uppermost in our mind”

That last statement might go against the grain slightly. However, unless we realise the realities of life at the offset, we’ll likely be in for some nasty surprises. Awareness of the importance of Personal Responsibility places us in a position of power. Leaning on others, believing they’re thinking about us and our needs, might work in the short term. In the long term though, it always becomes apparent, that through our vulnerability, we’re only ever placing another person in a position of power over us.

Further to this, if we’re needy because of illness this illness only acts as confirmation of the belief: “I am powerless.” In actual fact, it might well be our powerlessness, that’s the root to our illness in the first place! It’s a chicken or the egg scenario. In which case, we might want to ask: “Where and when was my power taken from me?”

“It is human nature to lust for power, and if you’re unable to retain yours, it will effortlessly be taken from you”

The ego desires power, it lusts for it. Knowing and accepting this puts you in a position of control. No, not control over others, just control over yourself. Take mental illness for example. Much of the root cause of mental illness is the continued ignorance of the sufferer. Honest, useful and empowering information, is part of the cure. This is something I believe.

Attitude

For example, if depressed, it might not seem immediately useful and empowering to be asked: “So Johnny boy, how are you doing your depression exactly?” In the first instance you might want to punch that person in the face. Potentially, if just for a moment during the punching, you might well be cured of your depression. Who ever said boxing, or just a good old punch-up, didn’t have its uses?

On a more seriousness note

When our power is handed back, through someone actually telling us how it is, (yes depression is created by the person suffering with it because it’s buying them something) this is true empowerment. The tools for how we change depression, once we’ve accepted why and how we’re creating it, are another matter.

This is where the ‘put-up-and-shut-up’ attitude no longer lives. When approaching the professional nowadays, it’s very unlikely you’ll be told to just take an aspirin, and to then simply hope for the best. There are tools (rather than wretched drugs) at our disposal, that can help us to understand, how to stay well and clear of limiting conditions.

With this in mind we do all face a slight dilemma. When depressed, getting up and doing something about it, can feel like the equivalent to climbing a mountain. It’s a catch twenty two situation. We don’t want to feel the way we do, but don’t have the first clue, as to how we go about changing it.   

“Ultimately it comes down to choice. We either carry on living a half life or we decide to climb that mountain. It’s a decision”

Seeking the necessary information is a decision. Accepting that there’s some work ahead is also a decision. We must reach the point where we’re prepared to accept this reality: “it’s only me that can fix this.” Once accepted we’re able to get out there and find the information required.

Attitude of Information Seeking

Much of mental illness is often cured through the individual changing their attitude and viewpoints to life. Often there needs to be a shift in the kind of philosophies we believe and adhere to. Our expectations, and what we believe life should be, needs a good shake.

Let’s for a moment, imagine depression as being similar to a meal devoid of that all important, pinch of salt. Many depressed are this way, because they themselves are leaving the salt off, believing life (or someone else,) should have already put it there for them. It’s an attitude of entitlement. Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way.

Unless we look and then bend down to pick up that container of salt from the bottom shelf, where we least expected to find it, we’ll continue to experience life as the bland meal we’re currently tasting.

One to One

I originally set out writing this post as a means of welcoming in one to one appointments. It’s clear to me now though, after sharing my thoughts, that this isn’t the way forward for me at all.

Moving forward often involves shedding the past. I’ve already served my apprenticeship – as a Personal Development Specialist – through the years I spent as an Analytical Hypnotherapist. Personal Development, as opposed to therapy, is partly about the power of group dynamics. Think of this: how is it possible to retain the mental illness of anxiety and depression, when surrounded by people, passionate about life?

“True empowerment comes as a result of finding the driving force behind it: LOVE”

If you’d like to experience me and the rest of The Freedman College Team, you will need to climb, this little mountain.

 

 

Reaching for Ideals

Ideal:

noun

  1. a conception of something in its perfection.
  2. a standard of perfection or excellence.
  3. a person or thing conceived as embodying such a conception, or conforming to such a standard, and taken as a model for imitation.

Should we seek the ideal? Is being an idealist different to being a perfectionist? The English dictionary defines the idealist as this:

  • Someone who believes that very good things can be achieved often when this does not seem likely to others.

We’re told that perfectionism is a negative

We’re told that wanting perfection, and only settling for this, is something to be avoided. If we believe there’s no such thing as perfect, yet at the same time seek it, we’re certainly going to be wasting a lot of energy.

Alternatively, when we understand perfection – as simply an ideal to strive for – we’re able to achieve our best in any given moment of time. Our efforts may not have been perfect, yet we can be comfortable in the knowledge, we did our best. In this respect we must have a ‘benchmark’ to reach for. There must always be a gold standard.

So whether we like it or not, perfection, is always going to be something strived for. The perfect body, the perfect house, life, car, job, child, marriage, we could go on. The downside of this, will be the negative feelings we’re left with, when we inevitably fall short. We’ll feel frustrated, dissatisfied and unfulfilled when we fail to reach perfection. Eventually we may give up altogether.

With this in mind, only reaching for the ideal, is the objective

Being the best we can be without achieving perfection is the plan. After all, to be perfect would leave us with nowhere else to go; a very dangerous situation indeed. And so in this respect, it’s very sensible for us to see perfection, as unachievable. Thankfully there will always be better to strive for. Seeing this for what it is, gives us room to work harder, even when we know we’ve done our very best.

It’s the knowledge that there is always more that keeps humans striving to move forward. We can always do better. There is always more. A very reassuring fact. This brings me on to the key understanding we must strive for.

At The Freedman College we believe it makes perfect sense for us to be striving for a better understanding of one key element in our lives.

“When we focus our attention on this one key element all other things are found”

If we come back to the examples given of what we seek perfection in for a moment (be it lives, bodies, marriages or houses), all of these things are easily achieved, when we have a clear understanding of this key element. Here it is: The Ideal of Love.

Once we cease – in our misunderstandings and misinterpretations of love – we will stop striving for an unachievable ideal. Because we’re confused about love, we don’t actually know, what we are in fact striving for. For example, we’re told that love is many things. The nonsense of this definition is the very thing causing confusion. If we don’t even know what it is, how can we strive to find it?

When young we often think we’re in love

We confuse the feelings we may have for someone as love. We may feel that we need someone, or that we feel lost without them; that we pander for them, or pine for their attention. We mistake lust and infatuation for love. We must make ourselves aware: Emotions of craving have nothing to do with love. Further to this, we mistake many aspects of fear, for love. We think because we fear losing them that we must love them. Fear of loss is fear of pain. Love is completely devoid of this.

We really only need ask ourselves one thing to know whether we’re in love or not. Here it is: Do I want to empower this person? The true emotion of love is something we’re awarded when we witness the freedom of our loved ones. Anything other than this will never be love and only a poor imitation and illusion of it. 

“To know if our version of love is reciprocal, all we need do, is turn the question around like this: Is this person empowering me?”  

At this stage be sure to have a clear understanding of the word empower. It is not empowerment to need a person and neither is it empowerment to give yourself up to another. Empowerment is when we’re able to lift a person to be a free individual standing on their own two feet who is the best version of themselves they can possibly be at that moment in time.

At the same time – as your empowerment of them – this power sets you free. The more people who have a clear understanding of this the better.

Here is the definition of an ideal love that we believe to be A Basic Human Right:

“Love and the ability to teach it, is wanting and needing to empower your partner and children to evolve into whole human beings who are free of fear, because that process gives you pleasure, freedom from your own fear, and brings you closer to wholeness”

Create Beautiful Partnerships

Wholeness is a calm acceptance of this version of love and that of yourself as a near perfect example of a human being.

Strive for this ideal and all other things will come.

The Time Machine of Opportunity

Time Travel Memories

 

The ladders clattered as he plonked them down on the roof rack. So they wouldn’t slide off when he pulled away he automatically attached the bungee cord around them. That only had to happened once before for him to learn the importance of strapping things down. It was now something he did without giving much thought. His mind was on the day ahead: how many houses there were on his round today. How many windows to clean? Not too many, but enough to help with the rent, and buy some food later.

Life seemed okay. He was glad to have finally gotten away from his parents house. They’d recently moved into council accommodation on the other side of town. That brought problems of its own, what with coming from a middle class background, and then being thrown over onto the dark side of a council estate.

Glue sniffers on one side and milk thieves on the other. His mother hadn’t quite caught up with the fact they now lived on a shit-hole estate. For example, if you were naive enough to have milk delivered – as had been the case on the ‘better’ side of town – the neighbours simply got up before you, and stole it off the step. Really mother!? The final straw for him had been when some bastard had slashed all four of the new tyres he’d just had fitted to his car. What the fuck?

He’d changed the car since. He now drove a white Austin Maxi, not exactly much street cred in that, but he’d never really been overly bothered about that kind of thing; at least not when it came to cars that is. Besides, little did the boy racers know, it was actually the twin carb version; surprisingly quick off the mark. Yes things weren’t looking too bad; his little business was doing okay. This year he’d gained a few more customers; he’d also painted the exterior of four houses during the summer months. He could be proud, should be, but never quite was.  

His mind still on the day head, he turned around to fetch a few final things from the flat; water for his bucket essentially, it was then that he saw her.

She was rounding the corner of his street with an expectant smile on her face. His girlfriend, or, as he’d come to think of her recently, ex girlfriend. A week prior they’d had a row and gone their separate ways; at least that’s what he thought, and yet in an instant, all that had seemingly changed.

The row had started because his girlfriend’s mother disapproved of him; had even gone to the trouble of calling his mother to let her know: “My daughter could have had anyone but she chose your son!” slamming the phone down before his mother had chance to say anything. Hindsight had taught him a useful response: “Yes, and isn’t she lucky to have him.” Too late for that now? No, actually.

It was seeing her smile through the tears and feeling her neediness, and his emptiness, that caused him to take her in. She said she didn’t care what her parents thought. Said she loved him. It would prove to be one of the defining moments of his life.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

We all have memories of events from the past, that seem more prevalent, than others; memories that seem to pop into our awareness more frequently than others. Certainly in quieter moments of reminiscence – especially for clients during analysis – certain memories can surface with powerful clarity.

When we take a moment, to ponder on why these memories are the most powerful, we easily see their emotional content. It’s the emotional content that make our memories lasting. Happy or sad, angry or confused, emotion is the key.

The snippet of memory (often that’s all there is) relayed above, is significant, in its detail. For two people to be brought together through neediness, and the disapproval of parents, was potentially always going to be a recipe for disaster. Of course they believed they were in love, and to a great extent, they were. The only problem being, there was a slight imbalance in what that love was and meant, to each individual within the relationship.

As is now understood, in order to feel loved the young woman needed caring for as if she were still a child, and the young man needed to do the caring. There was no understanding of the empowering nature of mature love, or how this needed to be a reciprocal, for their relationship to have gone the distance.

No matter how long this memory is looked at though, the relationship was always destined to fail. Even if the young man’s girlfriend had attempted to empower him in return, it would have been rejected, or simply not understood. A woman empowering a man was not something he’d ever experienced, as such – and certainly not at that stage of his life – he would have never been able to acknowledge or accept it.

“Parents must exhibit empowering behaviour between each other for children to comprehend what a grown version of love is”

If we’ve never witnessed something, how will we ever learn, and know it. It’s the same with anything: when we see, hear and feel something, we have a far greater chance of it sticking. If we’ve experienced none of those things we remain in the dark.

Modelling behaviour is something we all do. When the model isn’t there to begin with, we blindly fumble our way through relationship after relationship, hoping to learn from our mistakes. A very painful method indeed. Fodder for the stories of dysfunctional relationships in soap operas no doubt. Painful and unnecessary.

Unnecessary, provided we take the time to learn a model of behaviour that speaks of grown love, and the importance of understanding what empowerment is. Not only that, but the importance of understanding and accepting the reciprocal nature of empowerment, is something we must grasp for our relationships to be both strong and lasting.

Powerful and evocative memories, that seem more prevalent than others, are there for clear reason. These memories are often pivotal moments in time and life. Moments where we’ve made decisions that a part of us (potentially a higher part) recognised as being very significant.

We make turns, changes and adjustments to our lives, based on the decisions we make. When we go back, and revisit prominent memories, we often see the alternative branches – of choice – we could have made. We see the consequences and effects of the moments we lived through with less experience than we have now. When we do this, we open up additional branches of opportunity, that are the consequence of hindsight. 

“Through memories we become time travellers that can correct future mistakes, through the clarity of seeing their significance, in the past”

Be aware of the significance of prominent memories, they may well have been turning points, in your life. Your mind may be saying: “See this and don’t do it again.” Did you make the correct choice before? Could you have done things better? Could your children learn something – improved on – from your own childhood?

Our Workshop Manual is the correction of future mistakes through having visited them in the past. 

What Would it Take?

“What would it take to help people understand, if the situation is bad to begin with, having children, will only make matters worse?”

And what if our understanding of the opposite sex, relationships and love, is also sketchy to begin with? How can we possibly expect to know if this person – we’re choosing to have sex with – is likely to make a good parent or not? How do we know if we’re going – quite literally – to be left holding the baby?

There is a golden rule that must be imparted to all young people: Only once you’re able to take full responsibility for yourself, should you have children. It’s obvious and yet it would seem the obvious escapes the minds of many young people. It’s no wonder the expression ‘snowflake generation’ has come about. What with their overblown sense of entitlement and lackadaisical attitude to life… blah, blah, blah.

You know what, none of this really matters, does it? The only thing that matters to the young is getting pissed, getting laid, and generally pissing everyone else off in the process. Or, to be more specific, it certainly is if you’re a young person, with no purpose, and no direction in life.

As a young man I might have been a fucking idiot but at least I was an idiot with a purpose: to empower another person. The person I loved. Without that drive I was nothing. I tried it once and my whole world fell apart. We all need someone to love; someone to empower. Without it we’re nothing.

Those might sound like dramatic words and yet there is a truth within them. In fact they might only be my beliefs, however, the point to pick up on here, is the purpose and direction they teach.

“When our young have no purpose and direction they are ships lost at sea with no sails, rudder, or engine. They are adrift and lost to us all”

The thing is, it’s not actually difficult to instill passion and purpose into a child’s mind. When you look closely at all the healthy, and dare I say it, wealthy people  in the world, what they have, is passion. From snooker players and physicists, to footballers and musicians, passion is the key.

If you want to keep children out of gangs, out of trouble, with the potential to live a long, healthy and wealthy life, find them passion, and do it quickly. It’s very, very easy. All you need do is understand the empowerment of love.

Why We Reject The Good Souls

 “Why do we reject the good souls? Do we feel threatened by them, and if so, why? What exactly do we have to fear?”

Many are very suspicious of people who wish us well; those who want the best for us. Many people who are in desperate need of assistance, or guidance of some sort, will reject that hand up; that gentle word of advice. They will reject the good souls.

In some respects, this must come down to our fear, of the unknown. If we’ve never been shown genuine compassion, love and concern, then how can we possibly accept it for what it is? People, who’ve spent their entire lives just surviving and getting by, will reject love. Those who’ve had to cope with the abuse and disdain, we humans inflict on one another, will obviously reject that hand up. If we do take that hand, who’s to know, what we’re likely to find? Something worse than we already know?

Often the used and abused will take assistance offered, only to find a worse horror, than the one they knew before. Better the devil you know and all that. So what is the answer? How can we get through to the damaged souls who reject genuine compassion and empowering love?

“The word that comes to mind is gently”

A gentle truth is what many of us require. The truth that someone, who might simply ask them how they are, or wish them good luck, is genuinely asking after their wellbeing. A good soul enquiring for some love. A love not many are able, or willing to give, an enquiring soul. 

Pride is one thing that can stands in the way. Pride, standing there with its arms folded, defensive and cold. A young man will often see an older one as a threat, not as potential for guidance, and betterment. A damaged person may only have his pride left, after everything else, has been stripped from him. Dignity disappears when we’re abused as children, as does much of our power. We may find strength in pride. We may feel powerful when we reject all and everyone from our lives. It matters not, whether they’re good or bad, pride pushes them all away.

I’ve learnt, the only way to deal with this, is to actually see what their rejection is: fear. There is a fear that the last thing they have; that last thing that’s kept them alive, together and helped them make it through, will be taken from them; their pride. What must those in need of assistance do in order to swallow their pride and listen?

“They need to believe”

Yes, on this occasion, it can be that simple. When we’re able to instill the belief, that there is actually something available to lift a damaged person, we’re halfway there. The way we do this, is to educate the individual as to the true nature of that assistance. We need to make them aware, of the two way street they’re embarking on, by accepting our help.

You see, when we offer help to another human being, especially one whose likely to reject us, we must make them aware of how offering assistance is about a selfish empowerment. Offering help will always be a ‘you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours’ situation. When we share this truth help is more likely accepted.

Help, is more likely accepted, when we realise we mustn’t threaten the survival of a damaged individual, through threatening to take their pride. Their last remaining stronghold of defence. In fact, when we offer the truth of our selfishness, we help people retain their pride.

“We never offer someone help when our unconscious intention is to take their power. This is so often the case”

When we offer advice, or help of any nature, it can often be spotted as a hidden means of empowering ourselves. This is when the damaged will reject us. Giving up a little of our power is when we truly help. We do this by offering the truth. We do this by showing humility.

Just the other day, I offered someone a good luck sentiment who was trying to give up smoking, and the response was this: “well yes, I’m just trying not to think about it.” A rejection of a good luck wish. Hindsight has offered me the realisation of what would have been a better strategy: to take a deep breath, look him the eyes, and say nothing. Simple, when you think of it.

So the next time you feel rejected, even when your intentions felt honourable, be sure to recognise what your unconscious intentions might have been. Those in need are used to being very, very perceptive of the human condition, and its darker side.

“We uncover our unconscious intentions when we see the truth”

Here it is: There is no such thing as a selfless act. None at all. When we make it clear, that we understand the two way street, of any act, we discharge suspicion from the damaged soul.

We must ask: in what way do I empower myself through offering my time and attention? We must then offer this truth. Understand: when we humbly give a little of our power away – by expressing truth through our humility – we will ultimately regain it twofold. We always regain power given away. When we look to take another’s power, we must continue to do so, with all those we meet. A vicious cycle many people are engaged in. We only need look at what’s happening in the world today. People in power seeking to take it from others. Rejection all around.

An Extraordinary Presence

CommunicationI often drive down to the car park opposite the beach. It was here, whilst listening to the birdsong in my head, that I thought of you.

Watching the seabirds and surf I thought to myself: it’s true to say, if we’re in love or have ever loved, it never leaves us. It remains an extraordinary presence.

I thought about remembering being lonely. So lonely it ached. At the time, I didn’t even know, the ache I felt, was loneliness. Now, all I need do, is think of you. How you’ve found a way into my mind and settled there, as that constant presence, is what‘s so extraordinary. How did you do that? You did it because you knew I needed to be saved.

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

On reading this you might think these are the words of someone who’s found God. They are not. They are the words of someone who has found their self. This wasn’t possible alone though. He needed assistance.

Because of this, it forms in my mind, that true love, is actually a skill. To lift someone; to pull them up to a higher place, regardless of where you are, is a profound skill. The skill of love. Some might say that this is a natural aspect of human nature and cannot be taught. To this I say: “I can teach you.”

How could I possibly claim to be a teacher of love? I claim this because the ability to teach love, without actually knowing it’s so, is something we’re all capable of. All we need is the desire to empower another human being.

“If you have no wish to empower others, you’re missing out, and will potentially never discover true love within yourself”

Of course how we empower – by what we believe empowerment is – defines the purity of our love. For a rich man to give you money, for example, is no form of empowerment. Even when we’re not particularly wealthy, just giving money, can never be empowerment. If we do this it must be accompanied by the skills required to use that money wisely. Without that, what we achieve is the entrapment of dependency: the opposite of empowerment.

When we think of dependency, it’s possible to understand the power of Christianity. Many are dependent on this version and presence of love. Christians supposedly love Christ, however – and even though they may feel the presence of His love – how they love him back is flawed. How do they empower a dead man?

“The only way to empower a dead man is to respect the memory of His presence. Christians supposedly do this through living by His example. It’s my opinion, as long as there are children suffering in this world, all Christians are being hypocritical”

You might now ask: How can we ever possibly eradicate all the suffering of children? My response is to say, we can’t. However the ability to empower – to love – starts, when, at the very least, we open our eyes to the hypocrisy of religion. For religious leaders, to fail at recognising where our problems lie, is hypocrisy. They’re not doing their duty; their job, as they themselves, have prescribed it.

In addition, whilst any religious leader continues to live in luxury, they continue to fail at their faith. They fail at honouring the memory of their idol, whether that be their particular form of God, or indeed, Jesus.

It’s the same with all religions. The religion is there to serve the individual. If religion was the force for good it’s supposed to be, surely education ought to be the main driving. At one time it was. What was taught back then obviously reflected the times though. Surely, if religion wants to stay relevant, in the 21st century, it needs to get up to date with modern understandings of the human mind. They need to understand where modern man is stumbling. Instead, they continue to reflect this very stumbling, with their own poor communication skills.

“At its root, love depends on communication. If our communication skills are flawed, the message is confused”

It’s no good just saying: ‘I Love You.’ In order to communicate this fully, we must act on our feelings. Like the woman I overheard telling her child ‘I Love You’ and then backing this up by giving her son all of her attention. This happened in a cafe incidentally. The proprietors had the foresight to provide reading material for children. She read to her son, whilst also enjoying the environment, of the cafe.

Most others in the cafe enjoyed the children (calm and entertained) too. I particularly enjoyed witnessing her attentiveness. The empowerment of love, was not only in the words she used, it was also in the communication of her attention. In time when the adult is alone, without his mother, he will remember the attention she gave him, and this may well be enough to take his loneliness away.

How we love each other through empowerment is deeply rooted in how we were (or not as the case may be) empowered in childhood. When we think of religion and how Christianity in particular has created the presence of Jesus as a constant, it’s easy to see the attraction.

“What we must remember though, is the constant presence of love, is only there when we’ve been touched by it; when we understand it”

The child in the cafe was touched by the love of his mother through her giving him time and attention. Religion attempts to do this by teaching us what was shared thousands of years ago. Much of it irrelevant today. To be touched by the empowerment of love, we need to feel that it’s of value, now, today.

Many still need the anchor of their faith. The unfortunate reality of religion though, is many of the lessons are no longer relevant. Their anchor is a poor imitation of love. A true guiding presence is one that is relevant in today’s world.  

On this note, finding love within oneself, is about understanding the mind. It’s about understanding, that as we grow, their are aspects of the mind that never die. The may get quieter, even to the point of not being heard at all, yet they never fully go away. Adults that were lonely children, for example, will always remain lonely (no matter what) until they understand what it is they were lonely from: the self.

It may seem odd to say we can be lonely from ourselves and yet this is exactly the case. So many of the difficulties we experience are due to a lack of this self-awareness. We constantly look around for something that will fill this void. Be it other people, drink, drugs or anything that will sufficiently distract us from ourselves.

“Sitting in the quiet is likely to be the hardest thing for the lonely to endure”

A lonely person sitting in the quiet is likely to become increasingly uncomfortable. They begin to struggle with the feelings their mind creates, yearning for the love and attention missing from their lives; their childhoods. Anything to get away from those feelings.

Once we’re made fully aware, of what we are in fact committing to as parents, childhood suffering will diminish. I can’t see religion helping with this anytime soon, what I can see though, is an educational programme that gently teaches the skills of love through empowerment. This will only ever be achieved through clear and clean example from the living, never the dead.

We may feel the presence of love, from those we’ve loved and lost, but the dead can’t evolve any further than the point and time at which they died. Something the religious choose to overlook. Let’s open our eyes and evolve.

what's the plan, maturity, loneliness

Loneliness and The Pleasure of Being Motivated

Understanding Loneliness

“Understanding releases the energy ignorance suppresses. We feel this energy in the pleasure of becoming motivated. Once we do the thing, we gain the pleasure and power, of our motivation.”

power

Some scientists, in their current, early attempts at creating AI, seem intent on giving them human characteristics. I suppose we’d potentially be more accepting of robots that looked like us, and yet, we must ask: why exactly would we ever need to make AI’s that looked like us? Furthermore, why would we need an AI to be mobile? So it could do the washing up?

Creating a machine in our image is unnecessary, very self-indulgent and only there to serve as example of our ability to create life. Surely we don’t need to keep proving our ability to do that! We know we can create life, but making robots in our image, may seem the obvious thing to do. In time though, we’ll come to understand, the true benefit to creating AI, is being overlooked.

what's the plan, maturity

We must be cautious in our attempts. Some level of dependency on machines is inevitable. To some, the dangers of an increasing dependency, are all to obvious. If we remain ignorant of our weaknesses, and the fear this brings, AI’s will inherit the earth 

“If we’re to make it as a species, we must gain better understanding of our weaknesses, instead of pandering to them.”

Many of us long to be cared for. Due to this we struggle to make the transition from childhood to adulthood. The examples we’re shown of life as an adult, are often example enough, for us to shy away from it. We’re shown that fear, pain and anguish, are part of adulthood. This can be the case but only when unprepared for it.

We’re not shielded from the beliefs and failings of the adults that raise us. We’re brought into adult stress and conflicts far too early. Because of this we look to avoid maturity through remaining dependent, either on the people around us, or society as a whole. That is, if society has provision for this dependency. That last statement makes you wonder: Is charity spreading the disease of that provision worldwide?

Is there a proportion of society allowing the ignorance of human weakness to grow. Is this giving them further power to open up the social divide. Why are our Psychologists, seemingly making matters worse, rather than better? Are they ALL fearful of the ‘career suicide’ telling the truth would potentially bring? Or are they happy to be part of the problem? Is their intellectualising and lust for recognition the very disease they’re supposedly healing?

The truth about loneliness remains the issue of us being lonely from the self. We don’t know ourselves enough to cure our loneliness. In this light, perhaps we feel creating AI’s in our image, with superior intelligence, will give us the answers we long for.

No doubt these answers will need to come from an intelligence, created by some other entity, before we actually start to take notice and listen. Ultimately, and whether we like it or not, the only way to cure loneliness, and all the associated limitations it brings, is to know the self.

“Just take a look at the people around you, and understand, this is all you are.”

If you’re dissatisfied with how things seem, release the suppressed energy of ignorance, by becoming informed. We set ourselves free, from those who need to believe they’re superior, by understanding their failings.

“ONCE WE FREE OURSELVES, OF THIS SAME FEAR, WE WILL COME TO UNDERSTAND HOW WE’RE BEING ENSLAVED.”

 

The Empowerment of Awareness

The Empowerment of Awareness

On this blog you will find many references to empowerment and the empowering forces of love. It’s useful at this point to further explain what exactly is meant by this.

The clearest example we can give, involves the empowerment of raising awareness. Before we do, it’s worth being made aware that we are bound by the limitations of what can be said, within a few hundred words, on a blog post. Due to the style of this medium we must keep things to a minimum in an attempt to retain human attention.

“It may well be, that a video or comedy act, would prove better at retaining attention, however, these options are currently unavailable. . . sorry.”

Does this mean that we don’t love you enough, to empower you by better retaining your attention with a comedy act, or video? No, not really. What this does say is, we believe that raising your attention has more to do with helping you understand that this actually involves the input of energy. In other words, the more we do for you, the less energy you’ll need to input. Which would consequently lower your attention. We need you to think. Furthermore, to gain understanding from these words, you will need to be aware and attentive.

With your raised awareness (and reluctance to input energy) you might now ask: Surely if you did this through a comedy act would you not have our full attention then?

Potentially this would be the case. Comedy is a very powerful medium for alleviating fear and guilt but does this through diverting our attention. Our desire here is to focus your thoughts in one direction. The added benefit is, fear or guilt really have little place, in the minds of those who’re aware and focused.

“The greater your self-awareness the greater your awareness of the limiting nature of fear and/or guilt.”

Suffice to say, the empowerment of love, is help to diminish these two negative forces. If you like, the empowerment of love is the antidote to fear and guilt. Videos and comedy may only be a temporary fix to alleviating these things.

“So, with raising awareness being the clearest example of the empowerment of love, lets get on with it.”

The quickest and easiest way, of raising one’s awareness, is through the acknowledgement of others. In other words, once we begin to take a fascination and interest in the behaviour of others, we become increasingly more aware of our own. As a result, of becoming more aware of those around us, we may then choose to become advisory. We may become more opinionated. As we do, we attract greater interest, from others.

For example, just this morning one of our members decided to make a colleague of theirs aware of something he’d noticed. What he’d noticed was that their criticism of another person, had become so frequent, that it could now be considered pathological. These are the exact words he used:

“Just to make you aware, your criticism of Colin, has now become pathological.”

Using the word ‘pathological’ proved very effective, in gaining the attention of someone, who doesn’t normally absorb anything. In fact, so contradictory is this person (to most things anyone says) that helping her raise her awareness is nigh-on impossible. However, the use of such a word, is suggestive, of mental illness is it not? This often gets people’s attention through fear.

Now, with your new focus and raised awareness, you’ll have seen the contradiction: fear was used to raise someone’s attention, when empowerment through love was said to be the antidote to fear. Well, your observation is correct, however, before we can rid them of the fear, motivating their pathology, a good slap, (metaphorically speaking) is often for the best. Think: a small dose of the disease often works as the cure.

“Put simply, raising our awareness involves energy. The more energy we have available, the more likely it is, we’ll have a high degree of awareness.”

In contrast to that last statement, those of us who’re dealing with high levels of conflict, stress and confusion, have far less energy available devoted to raising our self-awareness. To further explain, the colleague used in our example, expends such huge amounts of energy – on a defence system of clash, conflict and contradiction – that there is very little left for her to ever become self-aware. Her defence mechanism has effectively disabled her. She’s exhausted.

It’s important for all of us to consider how we use our mental energy and how this may be limiting us. Remember, the less awareness we have, the more we’re being directed by those forces beyond it; namely fear and guilt.

So there we are, empowerment through love because we’re aware of you, even if you are not.

Through Questioning our Beliefs

Freedom Sitting on a Beach?

Many of us believe that if we just had a little more money we’d be freer. We think that if we only had enough money to set up that business, or establish some kind of higher status in the world, all would be well. The truth is, freedom, has nothing to do with these things.

Clarity of mind:

“This can be achieved through a meditative state. During this state, we must look to drop everything from our minds, that we believe matters. When we’re able to do this, we clearly understand. . . freedom occurs when we shed the layers of confusion brought about through conflicting beliefs.”

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Freedom Costs Nothing

“The common man is indoctrinated into his expectations of life.”

The very broad and general system of beliefs we’re given, come as a consequence of our environment, during childhood. For example, when young, what made our parents happy? This is easy to answer, because most times all we need do, is ask ourselves what makes us happy. Happiness, and most importantly what makes us happy, is a learned behaviour.

“By questioning our ‘learned’ behaviour we escape many of the shackles previous generations have taught us. Paradoxically, many of the means we use to seek happiness, actually enslave us.”

It goes without saying, happiness, well-being and safety, are important to us all. How we find these things varies from individual to individual. One individual might feel free, well, happy and safe when he’s in the local betting shop, placing a months wages on a horse. Another, may feel free and safe sitting in his favourite chair, with his family around him, watching a good movie after a hard days work.

“Yet another person, who has questioned the types of systems we’ve developed to make us happy, may feel all these things when sitting alone on a beach.”

True happiness is achieved when we free ourselves from the illusions created through learned behaviour. When we take the time to really think about it, happiness is a state of mind, effortlessly achieved, when we have balance. A Buddhist monk for example, may well tell you: “happiness is achieved through realising the now moment.” How easy would life be, if we could achieve happiness (a state of contentment) through simply being aware, of our breathing? In those moments of awareness, would we be enslaved by all the ‘trappings’ of life we’re taught to believe we need, in order to be happy? No, in those moment, we’d be free.

“It may seem difficult to believe and accept, the most effective route to the true happiness freedom brings, will include: Creativity, Change, Challenge and Variety. All of which, can cost us, nothing.”

It’s worth considering a different route, to what you believe may help you feel happier, before seeking investment in that business. It’s only ever the ego (the best creator of illusions there ever was) that seeks a higher status in life, and is often driven by fear. Do we fear not seeming good enough? Our fears enslave us.

In addition to all this, raised self-esteem, is something we attach to happiness. The assumption is: low self-esteem equals unhappy. It’s certainly the case, if we’ve found activities – from learning martial arts to having sex – that help with building our self-esteem, we feel happier when doing them. However when this is the case, we’re also working to the same mistaken principle: Happiness comes from outside of us. This belief is our weakness.

Freedom
Small Diamonds Are Used To Change Big Things

We raise our self-esteem from the inside out. For example, if a child is small and weaker than his classmates, the solution will often be seen as something external. With this in mind, is learning martial arts the answer? High self-esteem will only be achieved during the hand chopping, board breaking classes. He’ll still potentially grow up to have low self-esteem in many other aspects of his life. If he never questions the belief: small and weak, he’ll remain this way on the inside forever.

“Now he has his ‘black belt’ what if he were drawn to a violent lifestyle? What if he or adopted a confrontational approach to others?”

Would this be a useful way to get through life? Far better to change how he feels about himself on the inside. We do this through helping him deal with his emotions in a gentle way. We help him question his beliefs about size: small is efficient, small diamonds are used to change big things, and so on.

The paradox is this: The greater the happiness – found through our archaic beliefs – the more enslaved we become.

Happiness is found through the things that help us feel less afraid; when we can fight we’re less fearful; when we own we’re less fearful. The bigger the car, or the house or whatever – now we have the black belt – the safer we feel; all paradoxical.

We really do live in a world that’s a mirror reflection of the true one. When we step out of this mirror – through shedding the confused conditioning of our beliefs – we’re able to see the ridiculous nature of the world we’ve created. Only then, will we find the freedom, that costs nothing.

Guilt and Hotspots (the empowerment conflict)

In a post entitled Ahhhhhhh… got me again! One of our members enlightened us to someone who enjoyed humiliating men. We’re glad to report that he hasn’t yet murdered her, however, if he’s allowed to stew much longer, we fear the worst. So with this in mind, we’re going to help him understand the, ‘for some strange reason’ of his predicament a little better.

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Hotspots!

We all have hotspots. That is to say, we all have some unresolved issues, buried deep within us, that others inadvertently tap into from time to time. If you haven’t yet read the post in question, then please do, and we’ll see you on your return.

Okay, welcome back. Now, as our member mentioned, he fully realises the issues Jilly potentially carries around with her, to include: loneliness, lack of confidence, love and a tendency to get off on humiliating people. A defence mechanism (or means to get people to reject her) no doubt taught her by the adults around her during childhood. What our member must also realise (to stave of the desire for murder) is that during his childhood he will of also witnessed those around him experiencing humiliation.

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Stock Humiliation

Perhaps mother humiliated father, or the other way round, and he, as a sensitive child, also felt this. Perhaps this humiliation went further and he also experienced it from his peers. Unable to defend himself, as a child, whenever similar feelings are aroused within him, as an adult, anger is the result (outward expression of fear). It would seem the inability to defend himself against humiliation is still prevalent, resulting in, (dramatic drum roll please) murder in mind. It has been known for passive-aggressive people to resort to murder when their ‘kettle-boils-over,’ so to speak. Oh we hope we’ve saved you Jilly, you poor, lonely lass.

Finding hotspots, through the annoying traits of loveless people, can be a bit of a double edged sword; an empowerment conflict. We want to hate them, and we even harbour murderous thoughts, yet the fact remains, they’ve taught us something very useful and empowering about ourselves. They’ve raised to the surface some unresolved issue from our childhood, and once we’ve dealt with this, there can only be healthy repercussions.

Healthy, because the more we know about ourselves, the more we’re able to find calm peace of mind. Peace of mind can only be found when we’re one with ourselves; when we’re whole. So, Dear Mr Angry member, Jilly is a blessing to you my friend, so please don’t kill her.

When it comes to issues of unresolved guilt – and because we’re in a generous mood today – the conflict here is, that fully understanding the negative destructiveness of guilt, actually leaves us feeling a little frightened.

Frightened, because to suggest repressed guilt, increases our chances of becoming ill prematurely, and further suggests we have no choice. The reality is the opposite. If we were to give you examples of how guilt has led to cancer you would refuse to believe us (yet be assured there are many), so we’re not going to do that. What we will do though, is help you understand this: when we take responsibility for how we create our own disease – through repressing our guilt – we actually empower ourselves through increased choice.

“The guilt is the root – and the unhealthy lifestyle – the mechanism by which we’re shortening our lives.”

Even though this is the case, we could also give you examples of people who’ve died through repressing guilt, who actually led reasonably healthy lives. We’ll give you just one example to ponder on. You may remember this person: Jade Goody. Think about how long it took for her to die after the world taught her to feel guilty about her racism, bigotry and ignorance; racism and bigotry she will have been taught in childhood from those around her. If our parents were racist, there is a strong likelihood that on some level, we will be too. Many cancers are rooted in our childhood experiences, and to face this as fact, can be a very frightening reality.

“Therefore it’s much easier for us to see cancer as something that is beyond our control, with its roots lying anywhere other, than within our own bodyminds.”

hotspots

The current trend for researchers, geneticists and scientists to seek the cure for cancers – and many other diseases for that matter – as being rooted in understanding and changing our genes, is in fact correct, but only when we also see our genes, as something inherited through the bodymind link, and our life-experiences.

Those around us always hold the key to understanding ourselves better. Humans really do need each other, and the more annoying, the better. So get out there!

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When We Turn to Love

Love

When we turn to love we must know exactly what it is we’re in fact turning to. We must have expectations that match the reality. We must understand how to fully utilise its power.

“It’s a little like running a poorly tuned engine, if we don’t know what to listen for and how to feel, how can we expect love to empower us?”  

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There’s a moment of clarity, some of us experience many times during our lives, and others only once. If you’re very unlucky it could be that you’ll never have this experience. In this case you’d be very poor indeed.

All it takes is a moment of quiet contemplation, to gently consider what you believe about love, and what you expect of it. So many of us have incorrect, limiting beliefs and expectations, when it comes to it. These beliefs and expectations often have the effect of completely neutralising its power.

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We often have very high expectations of love, and yet these expectations, are often misguided. Yes, it’s powerful, yet only if its fully understood, in fact, when fully understood, its power is fully realised. We think that love will give us power over others (“if he loves me he will”). We think that it’s some kind of magical force that makes everything alright, without any kind of intervention, from us. When we’re young we mistake infatuation and lust for love.

“Love is when we act through its power.”

Never mistake love for kindness, compassion, sympathy or care, love is a force that makes the brave dare. When we turn to love we’re making a decision to believe some very exact notions. We’re dismissing the childlike understandings that it’s in some way responsible for us. It’s our responsibility to find it.

When our carers loved us, when we were young, they’d found the love for a child. We’d found it through dependence. Once we’re grown, that love through dependence, is transformed into an appreciative one, we’re then able to share, with all our fellow man.

This is not to say we must care for our fellow man; what love states is we must find ways to empower them. For example, our fellow man who is homeless and hungry, can lift himself up, when we’re able to love him correctly. When we teach each other the power of contentment, rather than seeing injustice and inequality all around, anger is transformed.

 

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The greatest gift, we can instill in the troubled mind, is the knowledge of love. It’s not enough to simply say: “You must love yourself my friend.” The only way is to demonstrate this through example. If your friend chooses to stay in the gutter, is it for you to physically lift him up? Or is it more powerful to show him how to understand?

When we remove the martyrdom, self-pity and sense of entitlement, from those in the gutter, we free them to find love through giving. You might say: “What has the man in the gutter got left to give?” And I will answer you by saying: ‘Even when he thinks all is lost, he could choose to live his life by example, and this is plenty enough to give. Picking himself up and living by showing good example is how he will find love.’

You might ask: “How do we remove the self-pity and sense of entitlement from his mind?” And I will answer you by saying: ‘Remove it from your own.’

LOVE

Love

There’s a massive part of me that thinks: Really, what is the point? And the thing is, I really need to overcome this, or I become pointless too.

If more people asked themselves: What is the point in me? We might live in a better world. So many of my observations come down to age and experience. With this in mind, we must show humility, in terms of understanding, how it once was to be young and foolish. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t assume for a moment that I’m completely over foolishness, I’m not, however with a little love and a little help, we can advance so very, very quickly.

All we need do is apply ourselves and start thinking. Thinking, or not as the case may be, seems to be one of the major reasons why we’re currently experiencing so much turmoil (have we ever been free of turmoil?). When we step back and really consider things before we act, life would be so much better. It doesn’t take so called intelligence to be a better person either. All we need to do is start thinking.

“Cause and effect: What will/might happen if I say/do this? Is this the correct/loving thing to do? What is the point in my actions/words? What am I looking to achieve?”

All of that we do, that’s of a negative motivation and purpose, is self-destructive. We’ve known for thousands of years that it all comes back to us in the end: what we think and do is what we become. I believe we know, deep down, whether our actions are of good intention or not.

When I was younger, very few of my actions were consciously based on love, and the empowerment of others. The reason for this was simply because of my ignorance. Ignorance, or lack of belief, of the benefits to always being mindful, that what I say and do, must be based on one thing, and one thing only: love. Be cautious if your instinct is to scoff and dismiss this through sounding like a cliché.

“Lack of thought is driving so many of the troubles in the world. People who think like me are openly criticised for over-simplification, yet those who criticise us are only feeding their own self-centered desires to sound clever, through intellectualization.”

There IS a one fix all panacea – the intellectuals dismiss this as over-simplification – and for the very reason it’s not working: they don’t understand it either. They don’t understand love.

Love is empowerment. Love is a: “Hand-up not a hand-out” as John Bird put it. If we all stopped looking for complicated, intellectual solutions, and simply understood the real reasons and value for basing every decision we make (as best we can) on the empowerment of others, the world really could change overnight.

Allow me to give you an example. Why do you imagine the leader of North Korea is so intent on testing missiles? Why does he believe he needs nuclear arms? It’s simple – the simplest answers are always the ones to look for – he’s frightened.

What happens when you corner a frightened animal? What is the fight or flight instinct? Frightened people are dangerous people. He may believe he loves his people and as such believes he needs to protect them. He may believe the rest of the world want’s rid of him. He may feel ostracised and alienated. It would be far better to simply leave him well alone, as you would any cornered, frightened animal.

“Trump is falling into the trap so many frightened people set: to be attacked and rejected.”

What would it take to empower a frightened xenophobic leader? Quite possibly all that’s needed is understanding. Why? How is it he behaves the way he does? Is there any hope for a man who was raised in an atmosphere of paranoia, fear and mistrust? What is the solution to dealing with this person other than violence? How could we empower him and remain safe ourselves?

Consider what kind of world we would live in if every potential parent – understood these questions – and then asked them before procreating:

If love is empowerment what is the correct way to raise a child?

If the authority on parenting is love should we not fully understand it first?

What is self-centeredness and it’s dangers?

How healthy is my relationship and could it be stronger?

Do I understand love?

“I believe all we can sensibly do is look to add more love to the mix. The main issue we must deal with, right now, is our understanding of this force. We must hone and nurture the force of this poorly understood emotion. We must allow our understanding to evolve.”

We can assist this process by understanding why we seek it’s opposites: Why do we fear? Why do we hate? Why do we envy? Why do we control?

All of these things are aspects of the human condition, that raise themselves, simply through the ignorance of their effect on others and ourselves. When we’re taught the value of loving ourselves and our fellow man, from an early age, we have no need for the wisdom that age takes so long to find. When it’s clear to us what love is (empowerment) and we’re taught how to think, and bias our thoughts through the filters of love, we will all have better lives: simple.

Lens flare light. Cross on peak of Hoher Goell.
Teach our children how to think and how to love, because it would seem, that right now, we need to add some to the mix.

Teach our children how to think and how to love, because it would seem, that right now, we need to add some to the mix.

anger

The White-Hot Rage Of My Higher-Self

Anger & Rage
The White-Hot Rage Of My Higher-Self is Seeking to Understand

“I feel angry most of the time”

Yeah I know, it’s crazy isn’t it? “How and why do you feel angry most of the time?” I hear you ask. Well, I’ll get to that.

I recently read a story about the author Terry Pratchett. He said – of discovering he had alzheimer’s – that he felt angry. Well, I don’t have alzheimer’s disease, yet I can understand Terry Pratchett’s anger, and not just his anger in the moment and months following his diagnosis, I understanding by tracing it back to his childhood.

At school Terry Pratchett was bullied and told by someone – as he put it: “three foot taller than myself” – that he’d come to nothing because he couldn’t read or write by the time he was six. During the course of his life, Pratchett set about proving that person wrong, and he most certainly succeeded. In recent times, so enraged was he, on being diagnosed with alzheimer’s, that he went on to write a further seven novels and his autobiography. I believe the root to his anger, and potentially the root to his dis-ease, was in fact traceable to one experience.

“We can be provoked into action through some unexpected means”

It could be said, the very reason Terry Pratchett was so successful, can be directly attributed to the provocation he experienced as a child: A reversed psychology, that he decided to see as unintentional, from a person three foot taller than himself. Of course we can never know whether it was intentional provocation or not.

“So to the root of my anger. I have plenty of reasons to be angry. It would be pointless boring you, by going into all that unnecessary detail and I have no wish to emulate the symptoms of alzheimer’s, by going round and round in circles for you”

Suffice to say, I decided to release the anger, from certain experiences during my childhood, many moons ago. This was achieved through understanding the failures, of the people around me at that time, as being due to their ignorance. This doesn’t make it right, what it does do though, is give me air:

“The air to breath so I may help free others from the damage ignorance can cause”

I mainly do this, by looking to avoid the intellectualization, so many academics seem to be unwittingly falling into.

“It’s easy to understand when those explaining it have nothing to prove”

So, back to my anger. I do it to myself. Yes, that’s right, there are times when I can feel myself walking into situations, where I’m going to prove, how horrible human beings are. Sometimes my anger is the anger I feel at my own disappointment. Yep. In other words, I feel angry at myself, for feeling disappointed in human beings. I question what right I have in feeling disappointed. I have no right to f**cking judge anyone. See the anger again?

Anxiety

“All in all, one thing I am aware of is my higher self”

It’s this higher self that looks to bring me into situation where I’ll feel angry. Take the experience of the ill-mannered lady mentioned in my ranting post: Just The Average Human Then, I didn’t need to try and drive into the space occupied by her.

By standing in a parking space, I knew she was trying to jump the queue, as it were, yet I drove on causing myself to become annoyed at her unthinking bad manners and ignorance. Her desire to overpower me, and all others who might have happened along before me, rightfully deserving that parking space, annoyed me: I’m angry at the injustice of it all. I’m angry at people and their constant need to f**cking overpower me or take my power away. I’m still angry at ALL the f**cking bullies of the world. I feel as if it’s become a one man crusade against ignorance and help all others understand the human will to power.

It is in fact very hard to resolve issues of bullying. If you feel victimised and bullied, and have felt this all your life, it quite possibly lies in one experience from childhood, that has then been compounded by many others as you’ve moved through life. We can look to resolve the bullying, through helping free others from this pain, and yet ultimately, unless we’re really able to deal with our own demons, the damage, of feeling powerless through fear, can remain far reaching.

So we go on. We look to right the wrongs, and find a way to use our anger in a constructive way, that’s beneficial to others. One thing to bear in mind, those who look to take your power, through whatever means – and be assured there are many – are the truly powerless. If that woman – standing in my parking space – had power of her own, she’d have told her husband to go f**ck himself and wait in the queue (with his car) like everyone else. Besides, I have so much power  – derived from my desire to understand – I’ve plenty to give away:

“You’re Welcome”

Remember, the truly powerless are those who look to bully you out of yours. They’re the frightened ones. Help them release their fear by understanding them. This is called LOVE and love will show you how they too had their power taken, at a time when they were also vulnerable. Help them feel powerful, by empowering them, with love.

Now Wash Your Hands

“It’s not love that hurts, it’s loss or fear or guilt that creates this pain. We must never fear loving people for the pain we believe it may create.”

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Only love can hurt like this?

Take for example the guilt, pain and loss that’s caused through infidelity. When our partner is unfaithful we must never confuse the pain we feel as love. It’s the loss of our illusions that hurts.

Alternatively, if it’s us that have been unfaithful – and guilty because of this – we must make ourselves aware: an understanding of love is ultimately what we were seeking through our infidelity. We’re all constantly seeking to understand, when we understand it, we have it for ourselves; we find it within ourselves.

We are healed by love, never through recrimination, revenge or anger. If you click on the above image you’ll be taken to a very powerful, emotive song. ‘Love is torture makes me more sure’ is a powerful lyric, and yet the torture we experience, is our confusion of love.

You might think: ‘It’s just a lyric in a song man’ and if you do, hold on, because you’ll be underestimating the power of music.

Music is an expression of the human soul. Why do you think we hold musical artists in such high regard? Listen, and it’ll become clear who Paloma Faith loves: the people who’ve empowered her.

Youth and inexperience are the main culprits for painful relationships. When we understand that love is empowerment, we’ll be able to make some very useful decisions, well before the pain of losing illusions is experienced. We’ll not be setting up the illusions in the first place.

“When you truly love someone, all you’ll ever want to do, is empower them.”

Manipulation, control and gameplay are all there when we fear. Fear is in direct opposition to love. For clarity, hear this: when we look to care for another adult – because we believe we love them – we’re making a mistake. Caring and empowerment are two very different things.

“To love a child is to provide the most appropriate care and attention, to love an adult, is to empower them. We do this through loving and respecting ourselves as fully grown individuals.”

You may of seen or heard of those people who enable morbidly obese people through cooking copious amounts of unhealthy food for them. Or perhaps you’ve heard of those who buy drugs, (alcohol or whatever) for others, in the belief they’re helping and caring for them. This kind of enablement is created through fear, confusion of love, weakness and guilt. So often we keep our fellow adults stuck through caring for them in the belief we love them through caring.

“Teaching a fellow adult how to be a responsible, guilt free, whole human being, is to empower and love them.”

Love is empowerment, and as such an expression of love, is an act that’s free of guilt, fear and control. Consider the church and its leaders. They believe they love us, when in fact all they’re doing, is disempower and controlling us through their antiquated teachings and beliefs. Treat people like they’re fools and what will you get?

“The continuation of archaic beliefs keeps the mind stagnant.”

We can set ourselves free by washing our hands of antiquated ideals, teachings and confusion. Literally, go and wash your hands now, you no longer need the past, there is only now.

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“Now we can understand: if you love someone, all you’ll ever want to do, is empower them, all the other nonsense is illusion created through fear.”

If you enjoy drama and the soap operas of life, you’ll no doubt be disappointed right now, however, when we remove all the childish nonsense from life, there are so many beautiful, imaginative and loving things we can be better getting on with – right now.

what's the plan?

So, What Exactly Was the Plan?

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Openings to mind

“There she is, appearing on national television, telling the world how hard it will be now, and how she may as well quit her job, because her benefits are being capped at £23,000 a year.”

Be cautious if you’re instantly feeling like this may be a judgemental rant, because as with most assumptions, you’d be wrong. All, that will be attempted here, is some assistance for future generations by using the above example further.

You see, the lady in question was being interviewed by a journalist on national TV, about the issue of benefit capping, and how it is now being enforced here in the UK. From today, no one will be entitled to claim more than £23,000 per year – outside of London – or £26,000 within.

All well and good you may say, as the intention – of this capping – is to encourage people, who’ve become dependant on the benefits system, to go back to work. The problem now being, as you’ll have noted above, and for reasons not fully explained, the lady in question doesn’t feel able to carry on working.

To add insult to injury, our example is a single mother with eight children (no that’s not a spelling mistake) and as such, benefits are currently something she’s not only dependent on, but her eight children are being kept alive with. And let’s not forget, the elite ruling classes of this country, do need all these children to survive, as a future generation will be needed to do all the hard work, pay their bills and facilitate an opulent lifestyle. Perhaps I’m joking with that last sentence, you decide.

Now, our journalist made the point that £23,000 is more money than many people survive on who work – and as a mother – she had decided to have eight children. A fair point, and the lady in question responded by saying: “yes, but I didn’t plan on being alone.” If I was interviewing this unfortunate lady, my response would be: ‘are you sure about that?’

A beneficial understanding of the human mind – is to know – that at a level our example wasn’t consciously aware of, she did actually plan, to be alone with eight children. An unconscious plan to prove her generalised, negative beliefs about men and women, will have been the driver of this plan. She may well believe this:

Men are:

users, bastards, deserters.

Women are:

used, lonely, afraid

These negative beliefs, or similar, are generalised in the unconscious mind, and will have been in operation at varying points during her relationships. Indeed, whenever a man left her, they would most certainly have become conscious, but if for a short time only.

So back on point, it’s not our single mother, with her eight children, who’s to blame here. Neither is it the hack-journalist – using her as an extreme example, for the purposes of teaching guilt, so the elite may retain power over her – no, it’s the fault of our failing education system.

If we could turn back time, one thing we could do, is this: We could take hold of our future single mother, as a teenage child, and gently point out some facts of life, that certain people would prefer she didn’t come to understand. These facts of life go like this:

“So far, during your time here on earth, you will have been taught some conflicting beliefs. Within these belief systems there will be positive beliefs and negative ones – you only need consider your physics classes for a moment, to understand the need for positives and negatives in the universe.

Now, when it comes to relationships, you may well hold the belief that men will love you, yet how they love you and what love is, may  be incorrect. You may believe they love you when they take you to bed. This is incorrect.”

You may also believe that because men are deserters, users and bastards, that having babies, is the solution to keeping them home, this is also incorrect.

If you would like a healthy, loving relationship in the future, where the man respects and empowers you, be cautious about how you behave now, as this will determine the type of man you welcome into your life in the future.”

If you’re a woman reading this, and you’re very fortunate, you’ll hold the beliefs – and they will be the predominant unconscious beliefs – that love is empowerment and that men love you when they look to teach you this, and build your sense of individuality in the process. The result being a wonderful, if not beautiful relationship – or relationships, as nothing lasts forever.

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Once courageous enough, we’ll all be able to empower our children in this way. Remember, there is no one to blame here, except a system built for control. Only when we have the strength to shine light, on the shadows of ignorance, will we set people free – all people.