Unfortunately Your Three AppCloud Has Stopped Working

 

Unlike the Locksmith I do have a phone. In fact, I’ve had one ever since someone – way back in 1998 – slapped their old one into my hands with the instructions: “Get a fucking life!” The only problem with it was the colour. . . Pink! Yuck.

Being in touch with my feminine side I learned to cope with the colour and eventually (having got a life) did even manage to upgrade it. My reluctance to own a mobile phone wasn’t so much about being a technophobe, or anything like that, it’s just that I often find phones a little intrusive, mobile phones say: “whether you like it or not stop what you’re doing and talk to me.” And yes, I do realise they have an off button, which is not dissimilar to pulling the plug out from the wall socket when – all those years ago – phones had wires (some of you may remember).

Anyway, yesterday I went shopping. Oh yes, money in my pocket, mission decided, I was going to get new phone. A ZTE Blade V7 to be exact; being cleverly tipped off, that this is the phone to have, I’d made my decision. So, into the shop; asked for the product; money exchanged, job done, until I get home and start the setting up procedure, that is.

To cut a very long story short, it turns out that this phone was initially set up for a specific network provider. With this being the case, if you put a sim card in – other than from this specific provider – and then begin the start-up procedure, you’ll find a problem. With this ‘foreign’ sim card inserted, after a short period of time, one of it’s apps (Three AppCloud to be exact) stops working. When this happens, you’re screwed, basically. You can do absolutely fuck-all with the bastard phone.

Bastard Phone

“My annoyance wasn’t so much that this happened (several times as I re-instigated the start-up procedure over and over) it was that I’d not been told that this was likely to happen.”

I was not told, that if you insert any other sim card (other than the specific service provider) at the beginning of the start-up process, it would crash the software. It later transpired, after much pissing about, that in order to disable the app you needed to set-up the phone without the sim card inserted. Duh. What a dick head for not knowing this!

Now, let’s just go back a step or two, shall we. When we ask ourselves, why didn’t I know this? The answer must surely be, because you’re a fucking dick head! No, no, of course that’s not true. The answer is, I didn’t know this, because no one had fucking told me!

It’s not possible for a man – who hasn’t grown up with computers, or fancy mobile phones, for that matter – to understand what the proper procedures are, or understand issues of compatibility, if he’s not been told. Simple.

“All in all a strange and straining week.”

When it comes to information there’s certainly a lot of it about. Take the further example of unfortunately finding myself without a working CD player in my car.

This is how the story goes. I’ve recently found cause to replace my car’s battery. In the process of changing it, the car stereo was without power for a short time, as such, I now need the security code for it to work again.

As the car is a recent purchase, and of a certain age, (not unlike myself) the only way for me to find the code was to get online, pay £9.99, input the stereo serial numbers, and hey presto, fifteen minutes later, the code is emailed to me. So much for security!

All of this does beg the question: what the hell have we done to ourselves? What with all the pin numbers, security questions, and user names, has the world not gone bloody mad? We’re told to never write this kind of information down, and yet if we don’t, we’re reliant on believing we have the gift of supper-memories.

“There is a trick to remembering all this differing information, without having to write it down, but that’s the subject of another post.”

The moral of the story – and to bring this little ditty to its inevitable conclusion – is this: if we’ve not been given the relevant, updated, modern information, we’re screwed. Do you have the relevant information?

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